Jan 6, 2011


                Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. -                
                 Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.                 
                         This is how it manifests:                         
                        I decide to water my garden.                       
                   As I turn on the hose in the driveway,                  
             I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.            
                       As I start toward the garage,                       
                   I notice mail on the porch table that                   
                  I brought up from the mail box earlier.                  
           I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.          
                      I lay my car keys on the table,                      
           put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table,           
                      and notice that the can is full.                     
                       So, I decide to put the bills                       
                on the table and take out the garbage first.               
                             But then I think,                             
                   since I'm going to be near the mailbox                  
                    when I take out the garbage anyway,                    
                     I may as well pay the bills first.                    
                    I take my check book off the table,                    
                 and see that there is only one check left.                
                My extra checks are in my desk in the study,               
                 so I go inside the house to my desk where                 
                                 I find the                                
                      can of Pepsi I'd been drinking.                      
                      I'm going to look for my checks,                     
                  but first I need to push the Pepsi aside                 
                so that I don't accidentally knock it over.                
                         The Pepsi is getting warm,                        
        and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.        
                As I head toward the kitchen with the Pepsi,               
                      a vase of flowers on the counter                     
                      catches my eye--they need water.                     
                     I put the Pepsi on the counter and                    
                      discover my reading glasses that                     
                    I've been searching for all morning.                   
                I decide I better put them back on my desk,                
                 but first I'm going to water the flowers.                 
                I set the glasses back down on the counter,                
        fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote.       
                   Someone left it on the kitchen table.                   
               I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV,              
                            I'll be looking for                            
                                the remote,                                
            but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table,           
          so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs,          
                     but first I'll water the flowers.                     
                     I pour some water in the flowers,                     
                 but quite a bit of it spills on the floor.                
                  So, I set the remote back on the table,                  
                   get some towels and wipe up the spill.                  
                    Then, I head down the hall trying to                   
                    remember what I was planning to do.                    
                           At the end of the day:                          
                            the car isn't washed                           
                           the bills aren't paid                           
                           there is a warm can of                          
                        Pepsi sitting on the counter                       
                    the flowers don't have enough water,                   
               there is still only 1 check in my check book,               
                          I can't find the remote,                         
                          I can't find my glasses,                         
             and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.            
         Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today,        
           I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day,           
                           and I'm really tired.                           
                    I realize this is a serious problem,                   
                   and I'll try to get some help for it,                   
                     but first I'll check my e-mail....


  1. Oh gosh do I recognize this ROFL !! try the keys in the freezer...jeez.

  2. this is my life every day. i wish i could blame it on age.....


  3. Okay Bucko, this ain't even funny!!!! I didn't say it was not true hahahah, just it ain't funny!!!!

    From Florida

  4. Stan and I both suffer some of these symptoms, but both of us maintain we are not old enough to have this disorder. :)

  5. I've been like that since 26.

  6. I think everyone gets distracted from time to time ... but I hope it never gets this bad!

  7. I'd laugh, but this is so true!

  8. OMG...this happens to me all the time! I have to, literally, talk myself into completing A TASK, before going on to the next task! Are our minds just so cluttered that we can't complete a single thought before another supercedes the previous one!

  9. Meanwhile the back yard is flooded because you forgot to turn the hose off.

  10. If this isn't true, I don't know what is. ROFLMAO


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